Squirting: 5 Moves That Get Her There!

Most men have tried to make this happen. Most have done it wrong. And almost none of them understand what's actually going on in her body when it does.

This episode covers the real anatomy behind this response, why the technique most men learned from the internet actually works against them, the one thing she's going to say in the moment that most men completely misread, and why relaxation — not force — is what makes this possible.

What you'll learn: 

✔ The anatomy behind this response that most men have never been taught ✔ Why the most common technique is the reason it's not working 
✔ The conversation you need to have before you try anything 
✔ The one sentence she'll say that changes everything — and what to do when you hear it 
✔ Why what you do after matters just as much as the technique itself

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Transcript

Welcome And New Show Name

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Do the sex. I'm Annette Benedetti, host of the podcast formerly known as Locker Room Talk and Shots. The show has a new name, Talk Sex with Annette. But at its core, this is still your locker room. It's where we strip away shame, get curious, and speak the unspoken about sex, kink dating, pleasure, and desire. Around here, nothing's off limits. These are the kinds of conversations we save for our boldest group chat, our most trusted friends, and of course, the women's locker room. Think raw, honest, and sometimes unapologetically raunchy. Welcome to my podcast where desire meets disruption and pleasure becomes power. Let's talk about sex. Cheers. Today's Talk Sex with Annette topic was brought by Listener Request. That's right, this is one of the top requests I get for a how-to topic. We are talking about squirting, the five moves that get her there. Today we're talking about the release that most women don't even know their body is capable of. Some people call it squirting, some people call it female ejaculation. I call it one of the most misunderstood experiences in all of intimacy. Most men think making this happen is the gold medal of sexual performance. Most women have either never experienced it

Listener Request And The Big Goal

SPEAKER_00 1:27

or it happened and they were so confused or embarrassed, they shut it down before they could enjoy it. And most everything the internet teaches about how to make it happen is either wrong or dangerously incomplete. Today I'm giving you five moves that change that, including the one moment, one specific thing she's going to say to you that determines whether this experience happens or doesn't. Most partners hear it and do exactly the wrong thing. But before we dive in, I have to remind you that I'm over on OnlyFans, and there I'm sharing my sex and intimacy, demos, how-tos, and audio guided self-pleasure meditation. I'm also on Substack doing a whole lot of the same thing. And you can find me in both places in my handle at TalkSex within it. And find me anywhere else and all other places, you scroll down to the notes below, and I have the links there for you. I cannot wait to see you there. But for now, let's dive in to squirting. Most partners think that squirting means she came. That's wrong. And that misunderstanding is the reason most men's technique actually works against them. Here's what's actually happening in her body. The fluid comes primarily from the skein's glands, which sit on either side of the urethra. These glands are essentially the female equivalent of the prostate. They produce a fluid that's chemically similar to what's found in male prosthetic fluids. It contains prostate-specific antigens that give it a distinct chemical signature from urine. It typically doesn't look or smell like urine. The volume varies from a few

What Squirting Really Is

SPEAKER_00 3:03

drops to a significant amount. Both are normal. This release can happen during an orgasm, and when it does, the experience is often incredibly intense. But it can also happen without orgasm at all, just from pressure in the right area. And it can happen involuntarily in a way that isn't even pleasurable. Squirting does not automatically mean she came. That distinction changes everything about how you approach this. So if you're chasing this as proof that you did your job, you're measuring the wrong thing. The goal is not to make her body produce fluid. The goal is to create the conditions where her body feels safe enough and aroused enough to release something that's been holding back. That letting go, when it happens with pleasure and trust, is what makes this one of the most powerful experiences in intimacy. Not every woman will experience this. Research puts the range between 10 and 50%. Some women's bodies are wired for it and some aren't. Neither mean anything about her or about you. This response is most strongly associated with G-spot stimulation combined with external clitoral stimulation at the same time. If you've watched my hand techniques episode and my edging episode, you already know the foundations. Today we build on top of them. But just like with edging, we need to talk about the partner who isn't there yet. Let's talk about the pre-moves. Before this can happen, she needs one thing. The single biggest barrier to this experience is not your technique. It's not her anatomy. It's her ability to surrender control over what her body is about to do in front of another person. And I say this as a woman who struggles with it myself. That's different from arousal. A woman can be incredibly turned on and still not be able to let go of this release because letting go means allowing her body to do something unpredictable, messy, and vulnerable while someone is watching. That requires a kind of trust that most sexual encounters never build. So if she struggles to orgasm with

The Real Barrier Is Control

SPEAKER_00 5:10

you at all, this is not where you start. You start by removing every goal from the experience except learning her body. You tell her, I want to learn what feels good to you, and nothing else has to happen. When she stops performing on a timeline, her nervous system can finally settle into a state where her body takes over from her brain. If she needs help getting there, adding a small, non-assuming external clitoral stimulation toy like the Wee Vibe Touch, which offers vibration, or the Womanizer Starlet, look at this little cutie. She offers clitoral suction stimulation. They can both help her start to bypass the mental loop she's been stuck in. These can handle the external stimulation consistently, so she doesn't have to worry about whether your pressure is right or whether she's taking too long. For many women, that combination, your hands, plus a toy that removes the guesswork, is what gets them to their first partnered orgasm. And from there, everything in this episode becomes available. Now for the five moves. Move one is learning the anatomy that makes this possible. Women have a prostate. Most men have no idea. And that's one piece of anatomy that's key to everything in this episode. The G spots on the front wall of her vagina, closest to her belly button, about one to two inches inside. When she's fully aroused, it becomes engorged. You'll feel a patch of tissue that's rigid, spongier, and more swollen than the surrounding wall. If you can't feel it, she's probably not aroused enough yet. So go back to external stimulation and give her more time. Directly behind the G-spot, on the other side of the vaginal wall, sits the skein's glands.

Move One Anatomy And Pelvic Floor

SPEAKER_00 6:53

When you stimulate the G-spot with focused rhythmic pressure, you're indirectly stimulating those glands. That stimulation causes them to fill with fluid. The more sustained and consistent the pressure, the more the fluid builds. But the G spot alone is usually not enough. The combination that most reliably produces this response is G-spot pressure from the inside and clitoral stimulation from the outside, happening at the same time. Same principle from my hands episode. The other piece you need to understand is the pelvic floor. When enough fluid has built up and she's at a high level of arousal, her body's natural response would be to release it. But most woman's instinct in that moment is to clench everything tight because the sensation right before this release feels almost identical to needing to pee. Every instinct she has says, hold that in. This release doesn't happen through pushing or forcing. It happens through complete muscular relaxation. Her pelvic floor has to let go, not tighten. Think of it like an unclinching fist. The fluid is there, the pressure is there, and the only thing preventing the release is the tension. When that tension dissolves, the release happens on its own. Your job is to understand that and help her get there. We'll get to exactly how in move four. Move number two is preparation changes everything. One of the biggest complaints I hear from women about this experience is that their partner just went for it without ever talking about it first. No conversation, no warning, just suddenly vigorous fingers inside her, chasing a response she didn't ask for. That's not how you make this happen. That's how you make sure it never happens again. This experience needs more setup than a normal sexual encounter. First, you have to have a conversation, not in bed, before you're anywhere near the bedroom. You tell her what you'd like to explore, you ask her if she's open to it, and you make clear that whatever happens, whether her body responds this way or not, you're completely fine with the outcome. No

Move Two Consent And Setup

SPEAKER_00 8:59

disappointment and no pressure. This conversation matters more than your technique. One of the biggest complaints I hear from women is a partner just going for this without ever discussing it. The technique can involve vigorous internal stimulation that can be painful if she doesn't want it or isn't prepared. Doing that without consent will not earn you anything except not being invited back. Once the conversation is done, prepare the space, towels within reach, a waterproof sheet if you want to eliminate any worry about the bed. You want to be thinking about pleasure, not about laundry. Have lube ready. Lots of it. Water-based. I have a list of some of my favorite lubes in a squirting guide. If you have signed up for my e-newsletter, I'll be sending it to your inbox. Or you can find it on talksexwithhenet.com. Also, your nails need to be trimmed and smooth, hands clean, nitrol gloves if they're rough. Go back to my hands episode if you need the full prep routine. Then get her fully aroused. This is not a two-minute warmup. Everything I taught about building blood flow first, touching around the target before you touch it, giving her body time to engorge. All of that applies here. External clitoral stimulation first. Let her body tell you when she's ready for your fingers inside. She's aroused, she's engorged. Now it's time for the technique. Move number three is the technique that builds this response. Here's what most partners get wrong with this technique. They saw a video, they think it's about speed, they jackhammer their fingers into her G spot like they're trying to start a lawnmower, and then they wonder why she's in pain instead of pleasure. The technique that actually leads to squirting is the opposite of what most people have seen. It's slow, it's gradual, and it builds. One or two fingers inside her, palm facing up, find the G spot on the front wall. It should be swollen, rigid, spongier than everything around it. If you can't find it again, she probably needs more time to get aroused. So don't rush this. But if you continue and she says

Move Three Slow Pressure Technique

SPEAKER_00 11:07

she's aroused and you're still not able to feel it, let her guide you. Whether you feel it and have found it or she has guided you to the right spot, once you're there, begin the come hither motion. I've talked to you about this motion in the past. It is not hard curl, it is a gentle press and release. Your fingertips press into the front wall and release. Press and release. Same motion, same rhythm. Start slow and gentle. You're not trying to force anything. You're letting her body respond to consistent, focused stimulation on an area packed with nerve endings and backed by glands that are beginning to fill. At the same time, maintain external clitoral stimulation. Your thumb, if you can manage the angle, her own hand or a clitoral stimulation toy, like the Starlit or the O-Touch, which both genuinely earn their place here because they can deliver consistent external stimulation so you can focus entirely on what your fingers are doing internally. You're not splitting attention between two jobs. As she becomes more aroused, two things are going to happen. The G-spot area is going to swell even more under your fingers. That's the skein's glands filling. And you're gradually increasing your pressure and speed. Not suddenly, gradually. You're climbing the same way I taught you in the edging episode. Here's where this technique diverges from the standard G-spot stimulation. The pressure for this is firmer than what you'd use for a typical G-spot orgasm. You're adding more force to the come hither motion, not more curl, more pressure. For some women, this builds to a point where your whole hand and wrist are involved, pulling against her body rhythmically. This is why consent conversation matters. This intensity can be painful for women who aren't prepared for it. Stay in communication. Ask if the pressure feels good. Watch her face and listen to her breathing. If she is climbing, you'll see the sign from the edging episode. The breath catch, the flush, the involuntary movement, the grip change. Keep climbing, stay consistent with rhythm, increasing pressure. And at some point she's going to say something that most partners completely misread. Move four is she says, I feel like I have to pee, but that's not what's happening. This is the most important move in the entire episode. As the skein's glands fill and the pressure on her G-spot intensifies, she's going to feel a strong urge that feels almost identical to needing to urinate. She might tense up and try to close her legs or push her hand away. That sensation is not what she thinks it is. It's the fluid from her skin's gland pressing against her urethra. It feels like a full bladder because it's in the same anatomical neighborhood. But it's not urine and she's not about to lose control of her bladder. Here's what

Move Four The Pee Feeling Moment

SPEAKER_00 14:12

happens next, and this is where most partners get it wrong. Her instinct in this moment is to clinch, tighten her pelvic floor, squeeze everything shut, and hold it in. She's done this every other time. She's felt this sensation with every partner she's had. And that clenching is the exact thing that prevents the release. The fluid is there, the pressure is built. The only thing standing between her and this experience is muscular tension. So don't stop. Keep your rhythm and pressure steady. If you stop, you lose everything you've built. And then tell her what's happening. Calmly, confidently, say something like, That feeling is exactly what's supposed to happen. You're not gonna pee. I want you to relax into that feeling instead of fighting it. Those words matter more than your technique right now because she's making a split-second decision between clinching and releasing. What she needs to do is the opposite of pushing or forcing. She needs to completely relax her pelvic floor, let go of the tension. Think of it like unclinching a fist that's been squeezing tight. She's not pushing anything out, she's simply stopping the thing that's holding it in. That's a subtle but critical distinction. If she tries to bear down or push like she's forcing something, she's actually creating pelvic floor tension, which is the opposite of what allows this release to happen. The fluid releases when the muscles relax. Complete surrender, complete letting go. You can tell her, don't push, just let go. Stop holding and let your body do what it wants to. And then reassure her one more time. I've got towels. There's nothing you can do right now that's going to ruin this. Just relax, be here with me. If she trusts you, if you've prepared the space, if the conversation happened, this is where all of it pays off. She stops clinching, she releases, and what happens next is move five. For some women, this won't happen the first time. The instinct to clinch has been reinforced for decades. That's okay. She's the authority on her own body. If she tells you she wants to stop, you stop. There's no timeline. Move five is when it happens, stay exactly where you are. Most men, the second they see or feel this release happen, do one of two things. They either get so excited, they change everything they're doing, or they pull back because they don't know what just happened. Both are wrong and both ruin the moment. She lets go, the fluid releases, and what happens next depends entirely on you. Your job is the same job it's been in every episode I've ever taught you. Don't change a single thing. Same pressure, same rhythm, same angle, same speed. Whatever you were doing the second the release began, you keep doing exactly

Move Five Stay Steady And Aftercare

SPEAKER_00 17:05

that. This release often comes right at the edge of or during orgasm. Her pelvic floor is contracting rhythmically, synchronized to the stimulation you're providing. If you change your input in any way, speed up, press hard, pull back, react to the fluid, you break the pattern and the orgasm either stops altogether or cuts short. So stay steady, stay in her, let the release and the orgasm happen around your hand without a single variable changing. And keep going. Women don't have the same refractory period men do. If your stimulation continues through the release, some women climb directly into a second wave, a rolling orgasm that stacks on top of the first. A toy held on her clitoris during and after release keeps external stimulation perfectly consistent while your hand continues internally. Her body keeps receiving the same input. The second wave comes. When she finally comes down, when her body goes still, slow your contact gradually. Don't pull out suddenly. She's hypersensitive. Slow your motion to nothing, keeping your body against her. Let her come all the way down. And then tell her that was incredible. Because for many women, the immediate aftermath is a rush of vulnerability. She just experienced something she may not have known her body could do. Your words close the loop. If she's a woman whose body does this involuntarily, every time she's aroused, everything I just said about not shaming her applies tenfold. Her body's response is not a problem. It's something you welcome. So learn the anatomy first. Prepare the space and have the conversation. Build a response with consistent technique and clitoral stimulation. And when she tells you she feels like she needs to go, tell her to relax into it, not to fight. And when the release comes, don't change a thing. Five moves. None of them work without trust, none of them work without communication, and none of them work if you're treating squirting as a performance metric instead of an experience you're building together. Not every woman's body will respond this way. If hers doesn't, that's not failure for either of you. If it does, it can be one of the most powerful

Recap Trust And Where To Find Me

SPEAKER_00 19:23

things she's ever felt, but only if she feels safe enough to let it happen. She is the authority on her body. You are the student. Give these moves a try and let me know how they work for you. Drop a comment below this video if you're on my YouTube channel at TalkSexwithanet, or shoot me an email at Annette at talkswithanet.com. If you are looking for more demonstrations to help you gain a better understanding, check out my OF where I offer demos, audio guided self-pleasure meditations, and so much more. You can find me there with my handle at talk sex withinet. So until next time, I'll see y'all in the locker room. Cheers.